In one of my recent workshops, I had the pleasure to meet an attendee who shared a story about her past that brought me to tears. By no fault of her own, she was a victim of a terrible act. She told me this story because I had talked about how forgiveness benefits the forgiver and I went on to point out that as we remain diligent in our daily practice, we can transform the appearance of past events into something that we see as useful or helpful in creating the great life that we want in our future. She didn’t see that as a possibility and asked me how to do that.
First, forgiveness does not condone anyone or any situation from your past that has been hurtful and unjust. Forgiveness is for your benefit; to make room within you to receive more of the good things that you’d like for your life. As Desmond Tutu said “Forgiveness says you are given a chance to make a new beginning.”